One Day

It has been a very long month indeed.
The holiday season is always overly stressful in the worst possible way. One would think that during the time of year we would be most thankful and cherish what we have, all we want is more, more, more. But, what can you expect in a consuming, media driven society....

Speaking of a long month. Can I just say that my body hurts in ways it has never hurt before? I can finally say I can feel myself getting older. And I'm only twenty-four years old. That's kind of pathetic really. Probably time to start taking better care of myself.

Long story short. I fell in a not so gracious manner on Halloween and my right knee hasn't been the same since. I'm not sure if I did some real damage or it what ever minor thing I may or may not have done didn't heal properly. Whatever I did though.. boy does it hurt from time to time. To put my Halloween fall simply, I was wearing shoes that were not my style. Little wedge booties. Granted these are beautiful wedge booties, but they are not for me because I have never been one to walk in heels. I am stumbling all of the place.... Back to my fall. I was at Walmart with my dad picking up last minute trick-or-treat candy for the neighborhood kiddos. We had gotten past checkout and I was walking briskly towards the exit. Something wet and slippery was coating the linoleum across my planned exit. Had I noticed it, I would have avoided it. Needless to say, I went down. HARD. My dad of course made a huge scene attracting the attention of the other guests, I realize he wanted to make sure I was okay. But it was only increasing my embarrassment. To be honest, I hardly even felt like I had fallen. The only thing that was on my mind was that I had dropped my groceries! Let me be clear, I hadn't really dropped the groceries..., it was more of a full on catapult type action. The bags went far above my head before crashing down with me. One of the jars I had purchased had shattered and delicious queso was spilling all over the place. I was mortified by that point. I wanted nothing more to make a quick exit. I jumped up and bolted out the door and made it as quickly as I could with my now bum knee as I could. I could tell there would be some bruising. Minor stuff. Nothing to be alarmed about.

I went about my mellow evening, and I continued to wear those shoes. I convinced myself that I would make those adorable cute booties my bitch.

I woke up the next morning and I couldn't straighten my leg. I couldn't even walk properly. I hobled about my apartment all weekend.  Thankfully I had fallen on a Friday night. I don't think I could have worked had it happened on a weeknight.

Several months later and my knee is still bothering me. It's probably time I have it checked out...Maybe.

Well that was a nice story. Back to this whole blog thing....

This is me. Writing again. Not terribly good at creating new habits. Old habits die hard unfortunately. It is the new year, perhaps a new resolution? I hate to say I hate new years resolutions. But I do. They are pointless and never seem to last more than a few weeks. But that's the pessimist in me.

It has been an interesting day.  Started off this morning with some not so good news.

Speaking for yesterday, the last day of 2014, I went on a lovely date night with my boyfriend. He took me to dinner and I took him to Zoolights. It's tradition that we do Zoolights every winter. This was our 5th time.

I rarely get on social media these days. It depresses me. I choose who I keep up with and I don't like getting a mere glimpse into everyone else's lives that I once knew, long ago. Several people got engaged. Several people had babies. Several people graduated. It astonishes me that so many people get engaged when they haven't known each other that long let alone live with them.

I'm starting to think that I'm in a bitter mood. Probably due to the not so good news. It saddens me when someone experiences losing a loved one. Regardless of  knowing the person who has passed on, it's hard to sit back and watch what it does to the said loved one. It's hard not knowing what to do, or how to comfort someone who is experiencing loss. What do you do? Act like everything is normal?  Cry for them? Make them tea? What is the polite and proper thing to do?

I feel like I'm rambling today. And I'm not liking it. I'm not liking many things at all apparently.

On a side note, I am starting therapy again. Perhaps that is my new years resolution. New year, new me. Pity. I liked the old me. But I also like leg warmers and watching the rain. I am a bit of a mixed up mess. Fancy that. I think I will attempt to keep one of those not so liked resolutions. Maybe keep more than one even.  I'll keep you posted, hopefully, of all my future endeavors, whether they be big or small.

I also, would like to read more. I love reading. I used to read for hours and hours when I was younger, in the tub no less. I think I was a mermaid in another life. A mermaid who stared at spoons all day and waited for something to happen. Indigo children. See how scattered I am?
I'm starting to think I'm a hopeless mess.

But I am quite content with that.
So here's to the random, scattered people.
I can't be the only one can I?

xo - Christina

Bacon...!

Lack of decisiveness will surely be my demise.

Have you ever struggled with making a simple, daily decision? Ding Ding Ding, we have a winner…! I barely can get my life together let alone chose what I want for breakfast. This is something I would like to work on. It’s beginning to put a strain on almost all of my relationships ie. work, family, intimate. Knowing it’s causing an issue, one would think it would be a quick fix. For some reason, that’s not the case. I struggle communicating what’s in my head. For the life of me, I can’t choose corresponding words with my racing thoughts. In turn, I shut down and it’s impossible for me to have a mature, adult conversation.

In my last post I mentioned that my family thought that I could have ADHD. I’ve been paying closer attention to my actions and behaviors and my dad might be onto something. I am a jumbled random haphazardly put together mess. Maybe one day I will get my act together. One can only hope. I’m not quite sure what my online journal blog will become. Perhaps a DIY blog? Strictly journal entries? Crafts made by me? Doodles and paintings by yours truly? Maybe an assortment of all of the above?

You tell me America!

Food for thought - What do you say in response to someone who gives you an unexpected gift? Not to mention the person the gift came from was also unexpected. Yet another mystery encountered in my life. Hint: Bacon.

Until next time,

xx

Christina

I’ve been told…

I’ve been informed that I should start writing again. I was also told that it wasn’t known for certain why I stopped but I should pick it up again. Apparently it will help me in the coming year with the new direction my life will be headed in. I will take this new direction with open arms and open heart.  I’m not entirely sure what I’m in for, but I do sense a change of pace and hopefully scenery in my near future.

I recently had my cards read by a wonderful woman by the name of Betty. She is a treat and I highly recommend her for any tarot readings and or spiritual guidance.

I requested to have a forecast reading. For those who are not familiar with readings, she let me choose a card for each of the coming months. These cards will provide you a clue or an overall theme of what to expect in that month.

The first card in my next year forecast was ‘writing’ which I find ironic. I never took myself for a writer but I’m told it comes easy to me. I was also told that I have a gift and it will be coming into focus in the next little bit. What exactly this gift is… I guess I will share that with you when I find out for myself. A card that brought up discussion during my reading was “throat chakra”. Apparently I have a talent for speaking to others. Now this comes to be as a surprise. I have often found that I have a difficult time speaking what’s on my mind. But perhaps this isn’t what she was referring to. As a reminder, we have to take a reading, along with everything in life, with a grain of salt. I don’t want to be one of those blind folded people who follow every word in hopes that everything will come true. Personally, I like not knowing what’s in store for me. Granted, this reading was very insightful. If anything, it reminded me of therapy. It provided a lot of insight for me. I often felt like Betty would use trigger words that caused me to reassess everything going on in my life. These so call trigger words allowed me to focus on the not so pretty details of my life. The details that I needed guidance on. I have never been a spiritual person. Heck, I’ve never even gone to church. In grade school, I did go to a Catholic school for a bit. To put it simply, it was a disaster and I begged my father to go to public school. Finally he caved and I ended my private school endeavors. But that would be the extent of my religious upbringing. Besides my brief time at Catholic school and the few mission farewells and homecomings here and there, church has not been for me.

During my reading, Betty mentioned that I had trouble months to be aware of. I need to be careful during April and May as a whole as well as September and October. I must be extra cautious in the latter two months.

I can’t recall every detail of what my reading was. I know the ‘patience’ card came up multiple times. Overall as a person, this is something that I really should work on. Patience is a different struggle for everyone. I find lack of patience for me puts my anxiety into full throttle. I’ve always struggled with anxiety and this is something I have just recently gotten help for. Now that my anxiety is decently under control, my family has brought to my attention that I may struggle with ADHD as well. REALLY? I’m twenty-four. Don’t you think I would have noticed that before now? Anyway, my family has won the debate over my mental health and I am to see a doctor in the coming week.

Overall I feel fine. I dislike how much our society pushes medications at us but that’s a rant for a different time.

Hopefully I haven’t scared everyone away after my over indulgence for detail.

Keep in touch.

xx,

Christina

Perhaps...

Perhaps it's time for me to start putting myself before others.
I always thought that putting yourself first would be the self thing to do, yet, as more time goes by, the more I realize it's something that needs to change in my life.  I need to start doing things for me and only me. Starting now....

If you happen to be looking for me, I'll be in my art studio painting up a storm.
Until next time.

xo - Christina

It's Been A While...

Hey You,
It's been a while.
Not entirely sure what I was expecting. I'll be honest, I am not the best when it comes to commitment. But I am trying, so that's something!
Since we are still new to one another, I'll tell you a little bit about myself.

I am a dreamer, an artist, feet on the ground, head in the clouds type of gal. 

I like to tell myself I'm creative, oozing at the seams creative, but that only seems to be the case if the mood strikes me. I find a peace of mind when I can pour myself into something, a project of some sort. Painting is a great outlet for me, so is sketching. I have taken to knitting as well, and more recently crocheting. I feel most calm when my hands are free to move at their own will.

I prefer watching. Watching everything. Taking in everything. Breathing in sights, noises and touch.

 Remembering the color of the sweater you were wearing when you first told me you loved me with all your heart and soul. Paying great attention to detail. Finding beauty in all things. 

I am a loner, I prefer the company of a good book, or the comfort of a Netflix marathon session. (I’ll admit it, I’ve become an addict to streaming television. It’s a blessing and a curse in my eyes. THIS IS A PLEA FOR HELP, PLEASE ADVISE.)
Oh, and I enjoy long drives with the windows down and music blasting.

I hope to see more of you in the near future.

Until then,
xo - Christina

Welcome!

Hello World Wide Web -

The name is Christina. (I also answer to Lion, Tina Bean, Tiners, Toasty and Christi.)

Welcome to my first blog. I thought I would join the blogging world in hopes to keep my life documented and organized to some degree.

I plan on sharing things that mean the most to me; family, friends, art, crafts, love and so much more.

Stay tuned.

xo - Christina